I'm an outcast

Apparently evolution, at least, for teenage girls has meandered in a different direction from the rest of us. My daughter can type meaningless gibberish at fifty words per minute on her Blackberry but is physically incapable of making her bed, or cleaning up the several tons of clothes she uses every day. And now that said Blackberry has been stolen she's in a world of pain.
   The fact that I told her on several dozen occasions to back it up has been conveniently forgotten. But positively my worst crime is that I cannot get the insurance company to replace it, right now, in the middle of the night. Oh, and with all her contacts pre-loaded. I'm such scum.
  Meanwhile my telephone company, (name obliterated lest and army of lawyers kick down my door), has invited me to thank them for repairing the local uplink antenna which has been broken for three months. Apparently it's partially my fault because I only complained twenty three times and threatened to cancel my account whilst daring them to take me to court just the once.

   Now after painting my newest picture I've finally managed to purge myself of the impulse to paint, so I'll be able to get back to writing. And as I've decided to go the traditional route this time I've taken my novels off Lulu and Amazon. I didn't get much action out of either site. Well none at all to be honest. I've kept the earlier versions on smashwords since the latest are vastly different and hopefully better. The only reason I'm keeping them on smashwords at all is that as a result of using their site, my book occupies the first four hits on Google when the keywords are typed in. That's not bad considering I didn't have to pay a penny.
  I've almost finished formulating some questions that don't make me sound like a  complete twit and I hope to have my first guest blogger in a week or so.