Saturday, 2 June 2012
For those of you who might think it's quaint or beautiful to live in London at the moment, or at any time for that matter. I have to tell you that it really sucks.
Every day the driving gets worse. They're building a train track that's supposed to cover the entire length of London. Its costs too much, it probably won't be finished before I'm dead, and as a result of the massive earthworks, every road in the entire city is collapsing. I can't even number the times I've had to apologise to my boss after his brand new Jaguar has floundered into a two foot deep hole that suddenly appeared as if the ground wanted to swallow me whole. On top of that we've got the Olympics. I don't remember how much the original estimated price was, probably about £1.50 in the usual cretinous way they cost these things. But it's already gone up to over £12,000,000,000.
And now we've got the jubilee. Don't get me wrong. I love the Queen, and have almost met my end three times whilst working for her but of the six or so still functioning roads left in the build up, these and all the bridges over the Thames will be closed for the next few days as an armada boats passes up the river. All the buses are diverted. If you even think of bringing in a car you'll probably be shot. And come the Olympics if we put a foot, or a tyre wrong, we'll be fined a thousand pounds every time.
And the weather's rubbish, and everything costs too much, and, and...I'm not having a good day. Does it show?
On the bright side. Oh, there is not bright side.
Does anybody know of a sleeping pill that lasts for three months?