My new friend, Derek.

This is Derek. He's not the coolest of pigeons yet, but he was only born a few weeks ago. I used to watch his mum sitting on him. Of course he was just an egg then, and his dad used to keep guard and feed her while she sat on the nest but he’s disappeared now – typical.

    Now that he’s out and about Derek spends most of his time paddling about in the pools of condensation from the air-con unit under my car at work. He’s turning into a good looking young lad with a major Jimmy Durante beak thing going. He’s really going to charm the chicks when he gets older.

    We have long chats while I’m washing the car or having my lunch. Of course they’re pretty one-sided. He doesn’t really like sport and knows absolutely squat about the economy. He wouldn't know a GDP from a GD Peanut, but I like him. and despite his diminutive size he's pretty good at dodging the boss' Bentley as it hurtles out for his five hour alcohol based meetings.

     Every day his mum swoops down to feed him and then retires to a safe perch before staring down, presumably wondering if her little cherub is ever going to fly so she can go off and do whatever it is that birds do when they’re not being mums. I’ll miss him. Or maybe I won’t. I know it’s wrong of me but he’s becoming quite fond of Doritos and chipolatas and he does moan and whine when I don't give them to him.

    He’s been trying to fly for the last few days and I hope he manages it soon.

    Incidentally, I read another story today about the death, or at least waning in popularity of the Ereader. Has it not occurred to these doom-sayers that there are a finite amount of people who can buy them? It’s not as if we buy a new one for every ebook. In the same vein, if people didn’t buy a new car every time the petrol tank was empty, would that herald the death of motor cars?